“Dear Pharmacist,
This is embarrassing, but I have such bad breath that I can’t keep a girlfriend. Every time I kiss a woman, she seems to shy away from me or basically, end the kiss quickly. Is there some type of medicine or vitamin that will cure this?”
–Signed “Kiss of death, but handsome,” Dallas, Texas
Answer: I bet some of you are chuckling at this question. If you think you have fresh breath, try this trick and see: Lick your wrist, wait 10 seconds and smell it. Please do this discreetly, because the sight of you licking and sniffing your arm is about as sexy as John Travolta in “Hairspray.” If it smells good, move in for the kiss with confidence. If not, give her a hug and call it a night.
I will assume you know that smoking or eating garlic and onions will cause bad breath, known more clinically as “halitosis.” I’m sorry to tell you, but there are no medications for bad breath either. One day, a drug company will advertise their version of “OraStench,” for minty-fresh breath. Unfortunately, you will still spend Saturday nights alone, because the side-effect is flatulence 😉
In order to improve your luck in the bedroom, we have to start in the kitchen. Stop cooking with so much animal fat, meat and dairy because these foods may be hard for you to digest. Eat more plant foods, like fruits and veggies and especially parsley. Plants contain chlorophyll, a dye that makes the plant leaves green. Chlorophyll is nature’s deodorizer. It freshens you from your mouth on down, including your liver, which is crucial. You can buy chlorophyll supplements, or try Sunfood Marine phytoplankton supplements. You can also find inexpensive “green” drinks at any health food store, just mix the powder with water and drink. Another cool trick, drink peppermint tea every single day!
People with insufficient acid can’t break down their food properly so it becomes putrid in your gut, emitting a foul-smelling gas which rises up (or down, heaven forbid). Acid- blocking drugs used for heartburn can cause low acid in the gut. So can a poor diet or medications because these destroy beneficial flora and gut integrity. Symptoms of low acid include hair loss, weak fingernails, indigestion, diarrhea, belching, flatulence and shockingly, heartburn! Digestive acid supplements are sold at health food stores. This is incredibly important, get probiotics so you can restore beneficial flora in your gut. Consider digestive enzymes too.
Visit your dentist because cavities, gum disease and dirty teeth will make you hoard malodorous bacteria in your mouth. Buy a tongue brush from the pharmacy and before your date, gargle with 1 teaspoonful baking soda mixed in a cup of water. You can also buy activated charcoal to temporarily absorb offensive odors, as in bad breath or gas.
Did You know?
There has been a 500 percent increase in the death rate from medication errors made at home in the last 20 years.
Suzy Cohen, has been a licensed pharmacist for over 30 years and believes the best approach to chronic illness is a combination of natural medicine and conventional. She founded her own dietary supplement company specializing in custom-formulas, some of which have patents. With a special focus on functional medicine, thyroid health and drug nutrient depletion, Suzy is the author of several related books including Thyroid Healthy, Drug Muggers, Diabetes Without Drugs, and a nationally syndicated column.
